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What is the most difficult relationship that a female can get herself into?

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One that causes you to compromise your values and that leads you away from God.


Tiffany Answers:

Dear Tiffani,


With all manner of evil running loose in the world today, I’m sure that there are many difficult relationships out there, ones that I probably couldn’t even imagine in my wildest dreams.
 
I dare say that one of the scariest relationships that any of you—
female or male—could get into would be one that causes you to compromise your values and that leads you away from God.
 
Your greatest strengths are having a sense of who you are and the things you stand for. If you’ve chosen Christ as your personal Savior, your sense of who you are is based on knowing that you are one of God’s valued, precious gems because of the sacrifice He made for you. Your self-worth continues to grow as you build a personal relationship with Christ and commit yourself to the plans He has in store for you.
 
When you honestly and truly realize that you are treasured by God, you are less likely to allow anyone to compromise your self-worth. That means you are less likely to let someone pressure you into having sex outside of marriage. And you are less likely to let yourself be treated disrespectfully or violently by your significant other.
 
Navigating the world of relationships is tricky. Since God has given to us a strong capacity to love others, we innately seek companionship. So we have to cautiously consider to whom we give our hearts, because that person can lead us away from God, our life source. If they do lead us away from God, not only does this put our salvation in jeopardy; it also draws us away from everything God intended us to be.
 
God knows what will truly make us happy. If we choose to follow a path that leads us away from Him and His plans for us, we risk experiencing a life of misery far away from our Savior.
 
As you consider would-be suitors, it’s important to bring God into your decision-making process. Pray that He will show you the real qualities the person brings to the table.
 
If you allow God to open your mind to discernment, you may pick up on some bright-red flags that say “Do not enter!”
 
One of the main ways to tell whether or not this person is the one for you is by how you feel that your spiritual life is moving when you’re around them. As you choose a companion, author Ellen White suggests that you ask yourself these questions: “Will this union help me heavenward? will it increase my love for God? and will it enlarge my sphere of usefulness in this life?”*
 
If your answers to these questions are negative, run away from the relationship!
 
To some this advice may seem “too spiritual” and “not real,” but your romantic relationships are very much tied into your spiritual growth. Relationships can bring you up or down in your relationship with God.
 
A person who does not respect your love for God does not respect you, and there’s no limit to what that disrespect for you can lead to. So if anyone wants you to compromise on your love for God, you need to think about how much of yourself you’re going to give away.
 
*Taken from Ellen White, Letters to Young Lovers, p. 23.


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