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Is it Okay to be Artificially Inseminated?


Is it all right to be artificially inseminated? I want to be a mom, but I'm not married and don't think it's right to have sex outside of marriage. I know that would make me a single mom, which is OK with me. So is it OK?

Steve Answers:

You're absolutely right about choosing not to have sex outside of marriage. Right on!

While God invented sex and made it very good, Satan has distorted it to the point that some people engage in sex outside of marriage. One of the negative results can be a pregnancy, in which the child is born without a family unit of a father and mother.

Wait, that's what you want—not the sex, but the baby without a family unit of father and mother. Is that really what you want?

Actually, all you really want is a baby (and to do what's right). But you'll get more than just a baby. You'll also get parenthood. That will mean the end of your adolescence, even if you're still an adolescent.

Some people want to escape their adolescence, and becoming a parent is one way to "grow up fast." Becoming a parent certainly pushes a person to be much more responsible quickly (or else the baby suffers). If you haven't done so already, talk to some single moms about what their lives are about.

But you also wanted to know if this way of becoming a single parent is right.

Because artificial insemination wasn't practiced in Bible times, there's not a direct answer to your question. Genesis 38 might give you some interesting reading, though. It contains a strange story about Judah, Tamar, Onan, and even Er.

It includes social customs of that day (like marrying your older brother's wife and producing a child if your brother died without children), and sinful practices that continue today (prostitution), and all kinds of deceit and unfulfilled promises. It's a story of lots of mistakes, but one thing that seems to come out right is that the twins do get both a father and a mother.

It's no secret that many families, even those that are "together," are messed up. A person could rationalize that having one loving mother is better than having two fighting or overly busy parents. But why put yourself (and your baby) at the disadvantage of being fatherless right from the start?

If you want a baby because of your own need to have someone or something need you—watch out! A baby will be dependent on you from the start, which means your independence is gone.

But that baby will naturally move toward independence, which will tear you up if that's why you had the baby. No two babies are the same, so you won't be able to predict exactly what becoming a mom will be like.

There are other options, such as surrogate parenting. This can range from occasional baby-sitting to working in a nursery to adopting unwanted babies. Full-time parenting is a great challenge, and I don't recommend doing it alone—for your sake or for the baby's!

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